Time to hit the snooze button on that ticker 60 minutes watch
The iconic stopwatch sound effect from Channel 9’s flagship current affairs program has haunted living rooms on Sunday nights across Australia for decades. As a kid, it acted as an ominous countdown to the end of the weekend. Bedtime was imminent.
In 2022, it points to something just as bad. A snoozefest of a different kind: tepid programming. Bedtime suddenly seems attractive.
this tic, tic, tic it immediately evokes a sense of fear.
When you hear that, you know something has gone terribly wrong with your nighttime schedule.
“How the hell did he 60 minutes out on my TV?” you gasp. “And why the hell do I still do it own of television?”
60 Minutes was once the show of dating. As it grew in the 1980s, no expense was spared, and its rock star reporters—media icons Jana Wendt, Ray Martin, and George Negus—were sent all over the world to cover wars, interview presidents, and stay with the A list.
But now? We are treated to an unknown interview between a random unknown reporter and Britney Spears’ ex-husband, a segment that was bought to a UK TV station, with Karl Stefanovic’s voiceover dubbed over the footage reassembled Catchy!
That’s what Nine aired a week ago, days after the music superstar released a 22-minute audio recording online, revealing in detail the events of the past 15 years since his controversial conservatory began.
In the audio, the singer explained that she had turned down “tons of opportunities” to share her story, and even turned down an offer from Oprah.
Well, Oprah may not have secured Britney, though 60 minutes fed K, and then punched Britney’s face in promos earlier. Take that, Oprah!
The backlash was instant, with Britney’s viewers and fans calling the segment out for what it was: a cheap, lazy shot at ratings. And it didn’t exactly go to plan, with just 428,000 metro viewers tuning in to watch the broadcast.
The format has become something special for Sunday night 60 minutes: Take a hot topic and hitch your wagon to it by interviewing a random person on the periphery who can offer inflammatory commentary.
It’s perfectly acceptable, but don’t pretend it’s prestige reporting. As if Jana Wendt had been caught dead dubbing voiceovers for a K-Fed interview.
The whole Britney trap is reminiscent of a Meghan Markle debacle the show got embroiled in a few years ago when it aired a hit piece about the duchess that delved into how she went from “adored to insufferable” by interviewing a conservative British commentator and a notorious troll. Katie Hopkins. The segment was universally trashed and basically consisted of Karl Stefanovic holding a microphone in Hopkins’ face and saying, “Say something bad about Meghan.”
Aside from the famous hit pieces, the show is basically just a TV version That’s life! magazine – the supermarket tabloid for seniors that pays readers a hundred bucks to share their craziest real-life tales.
“I found a family of nine living on my roof!” it’s the kind of headline you might see on the front page.
60 minutes producers to wish they could take an exclusive like this. Presenting searing research into the wild roof family, Tara Brown would stand at the center of the soundstage, holding both hands and staring down the barrel of the camera as she delivered an all-too-serious preamble.
“Imagine this: you’re making breakfast for your family one morning when, all of a sudden, you completely different the family crashes through your roof and lands on your dining room table. This is what happened to an Australian mother who discovered that a second home occupied the roof of her own house. Liz Hayes has this report.”
Channel 7’s magazine-style investigative show, Protagonism, has an upcoming special titled Who Really Killed Michael Jackson? and includes an interview with the singer’s ex-wife, Debbie Rowe. The 60 minutes The producers probably spit. An exclusive with the ex-spouse of a former celebrity? This is their territory!
These shows have practically become Where They Are Now segments. Who else can they pull from the 90s for no reason?
“Once a Hollywood it-girl, then Winona Ryder lost everything when she was busted for burglary. Twenty years later, and now back with a hit Netflix show, Liz Hayes catches up with the Saks Fifth Avenue sales assistant who caught the star stealing.”
Tonight, 60 minutes has readjusted in response to the Queen’s death after 70 years of service and will feature a special on the new monarch, with Tara Brown profiling King Charles III.
I wonder what innocuous bystanders they will interview for this bombshell. The Queen’s corgis? They’ve seen everything.
Twitter, Facebook: @hellojamesweir